"So what do YOU do?"
THIS.
This question.
I receive this question on a regular basis. One of the most annoying questions for me to answer at this stage in my life. Why?
1. This question is typically asked right after a lengthy conversation about Alex's career, which essentially means, "Wow! Looks like Alex has such an exciting career! Now, while he is basically being Aquaman in submarine city up in Connecticut, what is his wife doing?" So yes, the question is usually asked in CONTRAST to what Alex is currently engaged in; therefore, if HE is diving, Grace should be engaged in something driven and exciting as well. This leads to my second point...
2. This question comes with the assumption that there should be something MORE to what I am doing right now other than being married. Therefore, when I answer, "Oh, I am still trying to learn the ropes for being a wife right now...", you better believe I get looks. It is almost as if the word "wife" has a connotation of a dry, flimsy excuse that means you are actually doing nothing in your life. As if being a wife came with no effort.
Let's get something straight here. Being a wife, in a sense, does mean simply being married to a husband. BUT being a good wife? A godly wife? A wife that shines light on the Gospel of Jesus Christ? That is effort! Effort that, if it were not for the grace of God abiding with me daily, I would not be able to put forth.
Furthermore, getting married straight out of high school and moving away from everyone I know and love (except for Alex, of course ;-)) was quite a drastic change for me. A change I am STILL adjusting to! So yeah... college and work were not the first things that came to mind when I just started settling down in an entirely new life. As crazy as it sounds to some people, getting married actually comes with an adjustment period! ;-)
Please do not get me wrong, I do not write this post in anger or resentment of any kind, but I write this to give attention to the real problem in our world today. The author of the devotional I read in the morning, Paul David Tripp, has a really good term for what this problem is: people are "identity amnesiacs". It is so true! One moment, I am steadfast in God's Word and remembering my identity in Christ and His high calling for me as a wife (Titus 2:4), and then five minutes later, someone asks me "What do you do?" and I am scrambling to come up with an ambitious title for myself that has nothing to do with being a wife, homemaker, or any of the like.
Now if you were wondering, yes, I AM also a personal trainer (as it says on my bio), but let me tell ya', that is NOT where I spend most of my time on a day-to-day basis! I am at home, trying to figure out how much bleach to put in the wash to clean my shower liner! I am at home, reorganizing our cluttered entertainment center to look nicer when Alex gets back from work. I am at home, learning more and more about making this house warmer and nicer to live in, and finding new ways for Alex and I to get involved at church. Call me an underachiever, but this IS what God has called me to prioritize in life. Not my job. Not my college education. As a wife, I am to serve God, love my husband, be a homemaker, and serve others (especially in the church)!
As of right now, trust me, I have a lot to learn and make mistakes all the time. My family and friends have witnessed my several meltdowns about feeling like I do not know what I am doing and NEEDING a degree to be important, or a full-time job to be accepted. But hey, in the end, who's praise am I looking for anyways? God never called me to please other people (a fruitless work), but to seek HIS pleasure. If I keep aiming for bringing Him glory, who cares what other people have to say about me?
Do not get me wrong, I am not throwing out the idea of college or further job opportunities as if they are innately sinful for me (they are NOT!), but I have the freedom to begin those things in my own timing, as I am prayerfully seeking guidance for this transition in my life. I know God will provide for all my needs, and in HIS perfect timing. <3
Oh, right! So what do I do exactly? Well, I am a wife! A young wife at that. I have a part-time job as a personal trainer, but I spend a lot of time everyday learning how to be the best I can be for Alex and I at home. I love English, and would like to eventually pursue a degree in that aspect, BUT I do not want a single person to use my job or education to identify me. I am first and foremost a Christian saved by the grace of God, and I live to glorify Christ till the day I see Him face to face to face!
-Grace B.
THIS.
This question.
I receive this question on a regular basis. One of the most annoying questions for me to answer at this stage in my life. Why?
1. This question is typically asked right after a lengthy conversation about Alex's career, which essentially means, "Wow! Looks like Alex has such an exciting career! Now, while he is basically being Aquaman in submarine city up in Connecticut, what is his wife doing?" So yes, the question is usually asked in CONTRAST to what Alex is currently engaged in; therefore, if HE is diving, Grace should be engaged in something driven and exciting as well. This leads to my second point...
2. This question comes with the assumption that there should be something MORE to what I am doing right now other than being married. Therefore, when I answer, "Oh, I am still trying to learn the ropes for being a wife right now...", you better believe I get looks. It is almost as if the word "wife" has a connotation of a dry, flimsy excuse that means you are actually doing nothing in your life. As if being a wife came with no effort.
Let's get something straight here. Being a wife, in a sense, does mean simply being married to a husband. BUT being a good wife? A godly wife? A wife that shines light on the Gospel of Jesus Christ? That is effort! Effort that, if it were not for the grace of God abiding with me daily, I would not be able to put forth.
Furthermore, getting married straight out of high school and moving away from everyone I know and love (except for Alex, of course ;-)) was quite a drastic change for me. A change I am STILL adjusting to! So yeah... college and work were not the first things that came to mind when I just started settling down in an entirely new life. As crazy as it sounds to some people, getting married actually comes with an adjustment period! ;-)
Please do not get me wrong, I do not write this post in anger or resentment of any kind, but I write this to give attention to the real problem in our world today. The author of the devotional I read in the morning, Paul David Tripp, has a really good term for what this problem is: people are "identity amnesiacs". It is so true! One moment, I am steadfast in God's Word and remembering my identity in Christ and His high calling for me as a wife (Titus 2:4), and then five minutes later, someone asks me "What do you do?" and I am scrambling to come up with an ambitious title for myself that has nothing to do with being a wife, homemaker, or any of the like.
Now if you were wondering, yes, I AM also a personal trainer (as it says on my bio), but let me tell ya', that is NOT where I spend most of my time on a day-to-day basis! I am at home, trying to figure out how much bleach to put in the wash to clean my shower liner! I am at home, reorganizing our cluttered entertainment center to look nicer when Alex gets back from work. I am at home, learning more and more about making this house warmer and nicer to live in, and finding new ways for Alex and I to get involved at church. Call me an underachiever, but this IS what God has called me to prioritize in life. Not my job. Not my college education. As a wife, I am to serve God, love my husband, be a homemaker, and serve others (especially in the church)!
As of right now, trust me, I have a lot to learn and make mistakes all the time. My family and friends have witnessed my several meltdowns about feeling like I do not know what I am doing and NEEDING a degree to be important, or a full-time job to be accepted. But hey, in the end, who's praise am I looking for anyways? God never called me to please other people (a fruitless work), but to seek HIS pleasure. If I keep aiming for bringing Him glory, who cares what other people have to say about me?
Do not get me wrong, I am not throwing out the idea of college or further job opportunities as if they are innately sinful for me (they are NOT!), but I have the freedom to begin those things in my own timing, as I am prayerfully seeking guidance for this transition in my life. I know God will provide for all my needs, and in HIS perfect timing. <3
Oh, right! So what do I do exactly? Well, I am a wife! A young wife at that. I have a part-time job as a personal trainer, but I spend a lot of time everyday learning how to be the best I can be for Alex and I at home. I love English, and would like to eventually pursue a degree in that aspect, BUT I do not want a single person to use my job or education to identify me. I am first and foremost a Christian saved by the grace of God, and I live to glorify Christ till the day I see Him face to face to face!
-Grace B.
(This pic was taken at Alex's dive school ceremony; I got to pin him! Totally earned some fiancé brownie points that day.) :-P
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